Skip to main content

weigh in day - 222.4

I started off with a great week - got down to 219.0! The last few days have been difficult - mentally. I just want to dive back into old habits head first. I'm at nothing lost for the week and that should be a success. But I feel like a failure! 6 weeks - 18 pounds gone, that's 3 a week average. If anyone told me they'd done that, I'd be over the moon for them. ok. enough whining. I KNOW what i need to do.

This weekend I resolve to sign up for at least one 5k. And one sprint Tri. And start working out.

There, I said it. *deep deep deep breath*

I also need more sleep. at some point my body got it's wires crossed and thinks that food=sleep and I'm just struggling to fight the idea that if I eat something, I will wake up more - or feel more rested - or something! I know it's not reality.

Ok. Off to research runs and races.

TTFN
LauraLynne

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

that little voice in my head is an a**hole

I haven't been as heavy as I am now (250) in almost 2 decades.  I forgot how hard it is.  Physically and mentally.  And I'm spiraling lately.  It's been so very hard.  Everything has been hard.  I've been struggling with my weight - the pure numbers - my clothes, my ability to do simple daily activities, my self loathing, my eating.  Everything.  I feel like this literally effects every single aspect of my life.  And I HATE it.  H.A.T.E.  This weekend was especially brutal on me.  I am a retired motorcycle racer and now I work for a track time organization and ride during their events.  My race suit was custom made about 15 years ago.  It still has lots of life left in it.  But it was custom made for 200 pound me and doesn't even come close to fitting 250 pound me.  So I finally caved and ordered another custom made suit.  I send in all my measurements and waited.  There were some hiccups and dela...

day 1 no sugar...again.... and finding an OA meeting

Today I read a blog that really finally pushed me over the edge.  In a good way.  I NEED OA.  I went to the meetings with my church group, got started, really had some good break throughs, but I can't do this on my own.  I need to quit dinking around and find a meeting to go to.  It won't be a quick fix, but I'm really struggling with the food addiction part on my own.  And recently I've been lecturing a friend about their husband's addiction.  His addiction is gambling - and he's stooped to stealing from family it's that bad.  And he goes to meetings but - as she tells me - they don't HAVE 12 steps there, it's "too complicated with all the religion stuff."  So I've been preaching the 12 step program to her...hypocritical of me since I haven't followed through on my own meetings.  Today I find a meeting and by this time next week, I will attend a meeting. I am powerless over sugar.  Last night after I blogged about day whatever ...

PHEW - She's a Brick....hoooouse....no, wait.

Ok.  So tonight I planned on running.  Came home, sat down for  little while.  Forced myself to get up and put on my running clothes.  Went out the front door...was NOT feeling it.  Came back inside disppointed.  Sat down.  Got up, changed shoes, pulled out the spinner (stationary bike) and put a scary movie on.  Biked for 1 hour 3 minutes.  about 1 hour 2 min. in I decided I was going to put in a mile run afterwards - in triathalon training it's called a "brick".  It's meant to simulate the transition from one event to another.  From swim to bike or from bike to run.  Doing a brick teaches you just how it feels - in this case my legs were JELLO from the biking.  But I ran.  One mile.  in 12 min. 42 seconds - not too shabby!!  But better than that - I broke my streak of "nothing".  And I had a good dinner, one piece of flatbread pizza and a large tomato salad (no pictures, sorry).  About 200...