So, tonight, after a put a batch of Taco soup in the crock pot, I headed out for my training run. 4 miles. I say that self depreciatingly - you just can't READ that online. ONLY 4 miles. MERELY 4 miles. Not running the whole way, just intervals. Anything to take the credit or joy out of it. The reality is I should be proud. SHOULD be. But my stupid head tells me "It's only 4 miles. and you're not RUNNING all of it - don't be fooled, you're still fat, you can't run, so don't you dare be proud, even for a moment" STUPID STUPID STUPID. I should be proud. I should at least not be so damn hard on myself. As I was typing the above words out loud, the insulting ones, a thought popped into my head that made my eyes water a little. That voice. It was my dad's. Never good enough. Never smart enough. Never responsible enough. Never clean enough. Just Never Enough. That should have been my nam...
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I finally realized that it was stalling out any chance I had to make a serious run at dropping the weight. If you're gonna cheat for two days, then spend two or three days undoing the damage, it doesn't leave much of the week to get any good work done.
I finally was able to change the way I view weekends. Now they're an opportunity to plan for the week ahead and even sneak in an extra workout or two.
Keeping weekends in check will pay off big on the scale!